I’m not a quitter. Not personally, not professionally. In fact, people come to me when they need hope — a cheerleader — someone to inject them with possibility.
But every now and then, a client or a friend will share a story about their relationship, and I’m struck that the solution I want to invite them to consider involves saying goodbye.
Knowing when to end a relationship is one of the most important adult skills you’ll ever acquire. Given that it’s a skill, it is something we can cultivate with practice (and self-awareness). And beginning to identify the signs is the first place to start.
Here is a little reminder of signs that might be pointing to the end of a relationship. But just remember, the tragic end of something is the beginning to a fresh start.
You fight more often than not
Having fights every now and then does not signify an unhealthy relationship, they are a part of human interaction and how we choose to resolve conflicts. What should ring a bell is, when these fights become so frequent that it is actually surprising when a day goes by without fighting, when fighting becomes the only way you two communicate, when the fights get so gruesome that they go far enough to involve verbal or physical abuse, no apology can ever make up for this hurt and disrespect. Nobody deserves to be in a negative, draining relationship. Your friends avoid hanging out with you guys as a couple because you have turned into an ‘always fighting’ duo, you radiate negative vibes. If you find yourself always engaged in an inconclusive fight, over and over again, be it petty issues or serious ones, it’s time to take yourself out of the vicious cycle.