No one enjoys being lied to, which is why people rank “honesty” as one of the most important traits they look for in a partner. But when it comes to telling ourselves the truth, we don’t always hold to the same standard. Sometimes we fudge a little. Sometimes, in fact, we tell ourselves blatant lies.
Far from innocent and harmless, these self-deceptions can keep us from finding great relationships. Here are five of the most common lies we tell ourselves about dating:
1. “Love is for everyone except me.”
Even if you don’t actually say these words to yourself, they may form the basis of a nameless, nagging fear. Either way, the feeling of being destined to forever stand on the outside of love looking in is common. Instead of telling yourself this lie, stop blurring the line between fact and fear. The lack of a significant other in your life currently may be a fact, but projecting that reality dismally into the future is all about fear. It can also become a self-fulfilling prediction, keeping you from exploring new relationships.