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Hi NGTrends Readers,
I’m loosing my family… I need to make a choice between Keeping my 3 Kids in the US and staying alone here, resign my job and join them or return them back to Nigeria
I have worked successfully in a multinational firm for 15 years with my paycheck comparatively competitive in the contest of above the middle class in this country.
I became married and have been blessed with 3 wonderful children who attend the best private schools in this country. My children amongst their peers have always enjoyed the best of quality life… Traveling round the world for vacations, have the best of life and we live in one of the best locations within the heart of Ikoyi Lagos.
My wife, that i have over the years studied, and discovered to be a little bit materialistic and does not always accept the realities of life. I gave her all the good live, she was placed on huge allowances that could afford her the best women accessories and luxury items that make women turn crazy.
Trouble started when we went for summer vacation in the US about three years ago, with all of us on Visiting Visas status. We all had fun and visited the best tourist locations and parks in the US which i noticed captivated my wife. She started giving me ideas of relocating the family to the US, based on the lifestyle there and the quality of schools, which i was not convinced enough since our kids also attend the best schools in Nigeria.
About a year later, she cajoled me to also arrange for a summer trip for the whole family in the States, although i frowned at the idea due to the hard economic situation, but she always have her ways and understands how to use my kids to get out whatever they desire. At the same time, I wanted peace at home and i had to consent.
Trouble started when we embarked on the vacation and it was time to come back to the country and my wife and children declined and proposed to remain behind while i return to Nigeria and cater for their upkeep in the states.
I reluctantly agreed to this as i was convinced there is a likelyhood that the country may go into deep crisis due to the forthcoming election and the insurgencies. I nurtured the idea to keep them till after 2015 elections and return them back to the country.
To my dismay, the story changed when the elections were over and my wife and children having acclimatized with the American system became extremely reluctant to return.
It is so unfortunate that all of them have over stayed their visitors visa status and there may not be possibility of renewal in the future due to that, so i am at the mercy of agreeing to let them stay-put, however without any resident status, and my wife can not do any legitimate work.
This is seriously telling on me and my finances are dwindling as a result of huge bills they incur on a monthly basis as well as my quarterly travels to the US to see my kids and wife. Sometimes, i feel distance is affecting our love life as i now keep random mistresses in our empty house in Ikoyi, while i sometimes assume my wife could be doing same over there…. it is normal as she is human.
I cant continue to live such live, and if i decide to join them, i may have to quit my job and start afresh in the US, with proposals by my wife that they can always arrange permanent residences the Nigerian way. The other choice I have is to continue to visit quarterly while i stay apart from my family or I outrightly damn it and bring all of them back.
Please advice me.